Memorial Day
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“Happy Memorial Day “ seems to be all you hear in the week prior to
Memorial Day. When the very definition of memorial is to remember, it seems
odd to say ...
9 years ago
- L S. "Spencer" Olsen
- I don't really care if you agree or not. Just saying what I think.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
As most of you may or may not know, I work with computers for a living. My job entails network adminsitration, Project management, site installations, and a bunch of other things that if I tried to explain to you your head would explode. One of my monir duties is to assist customers with problems, or Customer Service. And as such, I get a lot of weird calls from people who do not speak english as a first language. Think about calling your customer service hotline and talking to someone in India and reverse it. That is what I do for about 10% of my day. Most callers speak some form of middle eastern language, spanish, or chinese mixed with english of some form. And to add insult to injury, they usually speak cryptically in pronouns. They call and say things like "Do you have that thing that is over there and when can I get it." No Lie! It's amazing to me just how many people are poor communicators.
It's not just limited to our customers; most of the people employed in my building have the same problem. I had our shipping/receiving lady come in and ask me one day out of the blue what I wanted to do with "Those boxes in the back." When I let her know that there were hundreds of boxes in the warehouse and that she should be more specific, she got belligerent. Turns out that it was 2 computer cases. So it comes as no surprise to me when I get calls or have conversations like this one.
Today, however, I got the most awe inspiring call. If you had been present during the call, you might have exploded from the sheer stupidity. Dripping with the kind of idiocy that usually pours from the mind of a mouth-breathing, bonged out hippie comes the best call ever. Sufian Abdallah from Florida called me today. And what follows is a typical call with just enough jackassery to warrant this blog post.
Sufian:
Spencer. The computer, the point of purchase computer.
10 second pause
Me:
Yes, what about it.
Sufian:
It's not working.
Me:
OK, is it on?
Sufian:
No. It's not on, but I know that there are some numbers that you type in that make it come on.
At this point, I am confused. Numbers? huh?
Me:
I am not sure what you mean.
Sufian:
Well, It is off. It is not working.
Me:
So the computer is off.
Sufian:
yes.
Me:
Have you tried turning it on.
Sufian:
It's on, but it is not working.
Me:
Are the lights on the front of the computer case on and if you put your hand behind the case do you feel air blowing on your hand?
Sufian:
Yes, but there is nothing coming up on the screen. I know that there are numbers that you use to start up the computer.
I am getting frustrated; but I am not letting him know it. And what the hell are these numbers?
Me:
Is the monitor on? Do you see a picture on the monitor?
Sufian:
No. But it just keeps spinning.
What?
Me:
Is the monitor screen black?
Sufian:
Yes.
Me:
Do you see anything on it at all? Is the green light below the monitor on?
Sufian:
No. It is off. But I just need the numbers that you use...
At this point, he starts talking to someone in the room with him...
What numbers? OK. Address bar. Spencer I need the numbers for the address bar.
Me:
You just told me it was off. How do you have that up on your monitor if it is black and off.
Sufian:
It's on! But I need the numbers!
Now he's getting frustrated with me.
Me:
So you are at the Guest Services screen and you need the IP address of the server.
Sufian:
Yes.
I gave it to him and that was all he needed.
This is what we in the computer industry refer to as a "Code 18" or in other words, the error is caused by the user who is 18 inches from the screen.
1 Comment:
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- Anonymous said...
January 6, 2009 at 4:11 PMThat is PRECISELY why I CANNOT work in the customer service industry!!!! That is PRECISELY why I LOVE doing data entry at IRS---No one bothers me and I don't have to talk to anyone else. On the communication side of things, I know what you mean. Bryan and his sisters do this thing where they "think" part of a sentence and actually verbalize the other part so the spouses are left saying, "what the hell are you talking about?" I learned that this summer when we were having breakfast at IHOP with his whole family before we went to the airport. I thought it was funny. I've just learned to ask more questions for more information and to lose the frustration because it's just the way things are. Plus, it's not like I don't have quirks of my own.
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